The Day After
by girl.of.horror
Summary: her birthday. but where does he think he stands in her heart? and as what?date: January 15


okay so i hope that i got this right. if i did, please tell me, then maybe i can finally post my ichiruki story. :D

**Disclaimer: **I do not own bleach. Tite Kubo owns bleach. Therefore, I am not Tite Kubo.

**The Day After**

Urahara Shop

Morning.

_January 15_

"Renji?"

That familiar voice shook him from his thoughts. A voice he so often heard yet he sorely missed.

"Ru-rukia? What are you doing here?" He acted dumb. He knew why she was here.

"I just want to talk to you."

"Talk? Yeah…"

Last night…

_-------_

_It was the night of Rukia's birthday. And he had not seen her today. Man, he was feeling so excited. Come to think of it. He had never given her a present before, hadn't he?_

_He was walking with a bounce in his steps and a big grin plastered to his face. The present he held in his hand wrapped in violet-blue silk. A color that so often reminded him of her eyes when she was happy. _

_He was struggling to hide his reaitsu, so that he can surprise her._

_Man, why did it seem so easy when she did it?_

-----

"About what, Rukia?" he turned his back on her. Making it seem as if he was giving his full attention on what he was doing.

"50 years ago—"

"50?! That's a long time, Rukia. Which one is it?"

"I'm being serious here, Renji!"

"Eh? You sounded so gloomy. Just thought to lighten up the mood."

_----_

_Satisfied that he had successfully hidden his reaitsu, he hoisted himself up the tree that was closest to Ichigo's window. If luck was on his side, Rukia would be there and he could piss off Ichigo. Of course that was because Rukia didn't go on and on when it was her birthday. She always kept quiet about it. He smirked and eased himself to a higher branch, already hearing their bickering voices. H probably didn't know, that Ichigo is dense, he'll be so pissed._

_The branch was thick enough to hold his weight and so he stood up on it, and readied himself for a jump to Ichigo's window._

"_Sh-t."_

_Ants were getting inside his pants and crawling up his leg. Some were even biting him. He felt so shitty. Holding the box carefully in one hand, he held on to the nearest branch and began lifting his foot, shaking it wildly. Mumbling to himself._

"_Sh-t. Sh-t. sh-t. Die you f----ing ants."_

_-------_

"You really don't have to do that Renji."

"Why not?"

"Just listen or I'll use bakudou no. 61 on you."

"All right, you---"

He stopped himself when he saw her turning serious.

She took a deep breath, and started.

'_This is gonna hurt.'_

"When I told you I was going to be adopted by Nii-sama…that day…"

He knows what he should be feeling. But he didn't know if he was feeling it. He doesn't want to delve into it and cause himself more pain. More regrets.

_-----_

_He was smiling idiotically. _

_He looked at the sturdy package, feeling extremely lucky and happy that it wasn't scratched or whatever was worse when he jumped to another branch to get away from the ants. He was much closer to the window now._

_But he wasn't hearing their voices. He strained his ears, trying to catch some audible sounds._

_There. A low murmur, followed by another. _

_Was that…Ichigo?_

"_No! No! It's not that. It's just that…I thought if I wasn't a Kuchiki—_"

"_Shut up. You're too noisy."_

"_You----!"_

_Movements. And then._

"_After we fought---_"

"_He lost that fight, didn't he?"_

"_I told you to shut up, idiot. Why don't you just listen to me?"_

"…_."_

"_He regrets it."_

"…_He…He does?"_

"_Hey! You're already on my bed, do you even have to take that pillow?!"_

"_Answer me, Ichigo!"_

"_I already told you, didn't I? Sheesh, weren't you listening?"_

_No answer from Rukia._

"_You weren't exactly talking to him."_

_Still no answer._

"_Don't give me that look. People talk, you know._ "

"_Thanks, Ichigo….."_

-------

"I knew I couldn't refuse. I wanted to, but they would just pressure me until I had to. Though, I would have liked to have remained friends with you in the academy."

'_Friends.. .'_

------

"_Here. Catch."_

"_Waah!!! What's thi----CHAPPY LIMITED SUPER DELUXE EDITION!"_

_He could listen to her happy chattering all night, but he knew it wasn't him who could make her that happy anymore._

"_Damn it. You don't have to be so noisy. I can't focus on my notes."_

"_Why'd you get it?"_

"_You always annoy me."_

"_But I didn—_"

"_Shut up already!"_

-------

"Your reaction that day…it only confirmed what I had been afraid of."

"That was a long time ago, Rukia."

Sorry. That was what he wanted to say. Sorry, I drove you away that time when you needed me most.

Sorry, that I am always a coward, afraid of saying what I really want.

Sorry, that I always deprive myself.

"Forget about it."

How long have I been acting so stupid, Rukia?

"Renji…"

He placed a large hand on her head.

He felt relieved to find that his hand wasn't trembling. His voice sounded freakily normal to his ears.

"Stop being too hard on yourself! How many times do I have to tell you that?"

"Yeah…"

He knew why she was here. Ichigo somehow convinced her into talking about it. Something Rukia rarely did, or never did before. She was always so hard on herself. He had known that. But she didn't always open up to him, and he never forced her to.

All those years and memories.

Beep. Beep. Beep.

He tensed.

"Hollow?"

Those eyebrows furrowed and immediately relaxed as those violet eyes of hers glowed with an emotion he dare not name.

"No. Just a message from Ichigo."

He watched her.

"Gah! I'm late! I didn't know it took so long."

"Che."

A soft hand touched his arm. For a wild moment, he thought of flinching from it.

"Thanks Renji."

"Yeah, right. Now go!"

He could never bear to turn her away from him again.

------

"'_Night, Ichigo!"_

"_Just close the door already!"_

_He heard the door close and as he tried to go down from that horrible! tree, he took a glance at that room----- and froze._

_Even as far away from Ichigo as he was, he knew what Ichigo held in his hands._

_A sheet of paper he had taken from a book and held in front of him. Even as far away as he was, he knew that whatever was written on it, the paper would contain her name._

_He stayed there, frozen; watching him as he slowly toyed with the paper, then looked at the door, and heard the soft sound of the chair screeching. Watched Ichigo as he walked, and faltered when he arrived at the door. Watched him as his hand rose to crumple the once pristine sheet of paper._

--------

He watched Rukia's retreating back.

What did he miss during those past 50 years?

His hand brushed against the box in his pocket.

His gift. It was a piece of crystal. Clear, white and pure. As he saw her.

It had cost a hell of a lot….but it didn't matter.

One day. One day for sure. He'll give it to her. For now, he'll just hold on to it.

His thoughts drifted back to the orange-haired shinigami.

He would never forget the glow on her face when he told her that he had infiltrated seireitei, it had irked him to know that someone she only knew for two months could bring back that glow. Nor could he forget that Rukia was willing to forget about upholding rules as a noble to follow that boy to Hueco Mundo.

He clenched his fist as Rukia's back disappeared from sight.

That boy….

He knew Rukia longer, yet why did that boy hold such a great importance in Rukia's….heart?

He would always be a friend….no, almost like a brother to her. It was enough for him. No matter how much he wanted it not to be. It would always be enough for him.

He closed the door of the shop with the feel of lead sinking down his stomach.

Reality have intruded once again.

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(**T .T**)are thy ooc? i really need to know...

Thanks for reading. Review. Flame. Review.


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